Return of Lost Things (or friends and anything in between)

Of course, my dear readers, what do I love most in life is to make a list. Today is another one of them.

The title of this list is really simple, the return of lost things. As simple as it means, I have been seeing a trend of objects, people, ideas and circumstances coming back to life and they have been making themselves felt. I thought I have lost them for good, but no, they have a way of coming back. They sometimes even force their way into coming back to my life, but my energy is just enough for my daily routine and even now my energy is barely enough to hold my routine in the house in this pandemic era.

So, here we go

(A) Guadi is back! This one is a very happy news for me. If you may recall, Guadi died last August, but this weekend, my mom forced me to resurrect it by going to laptop repair shop. Yay, it worked. Guadi, my beloved overworked laptop is now given a second life. Welcome back to the living side of the world Guadi. I actually believed that you deserve the 6-month rest because you have been enduring impossible working schedules in the most grueling places and circumstances for the last 3 years. I am of course very guilty for making you work so hard, but you have endured it with me. And you know how lost I was when you temporarily died. But here, you are back in my arms again. It's so lovely to be working day and night with you again Guadi. Please stay longer with me this time, okay? I promise I will take good care of you, but I cannot promise that you will work lesser hours, sorry. But I know you know what it means to be my laptop right? 

So welcome back to the living part of the world Guadi ^^

(B) Doing my online classes in my bedroom instead of living room.

Mom and I had a bitter fight last week. She was tired of me banishing them to different parts of the house because I demanded a lot of space and quiet time when I am doing my online classes. Of course, I have known my mom my whole life, she is the kind who will only endure within her set limits, eventually when you overstep the boundary, she will retaliate with a bomb. I guessed I have been walking the fine line of her boundary until one day I overstepped, so she exploded and I was sent away from the living room before I could muster a proper look of surprise. I wasn't given a time to digest what happened at all, she just bullishly attacked me verbally and so I lost. That's really her style. It is still scary until now for me. My adult self is still scared of my mom, tbh.

(C) Friends starting to keep in touch

Oh yeah, I am sorry about this. No energy to answer and even I am at a lost on how to even start a catch up script in my mind. Like, hi how are you? Have you been well? How was your Christmas, New Year? blah blah. No, I couldn't imagine myself going through the stale script. I just wanted to be quiet. I am not a snob, it is just my energy doesn't support extra social communication right now. I am stretched in my online classes, housework duties and other writing projects daily, I can't seem to muster anymore energy to cover socmed conversation. Maybe eventually. But definitely not now.

(D) My old papers in my graduate studies

These ones, I actively dug them up from my vault. Interesting how we really change perspectives as years passed. I had been reading many old papers that I have written four, or three years back. Some of them I still hold true for myself but some of them, I need to trim or edit to sound genuine and true to my current state of mind.

So far, that's it.

 

Belated happy valentines my dear readers, I hope you had a wonderful time yesterday ^^