So what is the essence of a being?

Ok, am just carried away by the beauty of nature surrounding us in UP Diliman, thus the title of my post. Don't you appreciate the different shades of green ^^ (as mentioned by Masa) ----> indeed, it's very inspiring and moving. TO HAVE NATURE HEAL US is the most important gift we all possess. Today, I feel like I am flowing. Not floating. Flowing. As in water. As in liquid. I flow. As waters dissolve boundaries, I feel like I am evading the walls, imaginary walls of my personality. I am expanding. I am flowing. With life. With love. With the nature.
From Romina ---> Familiarity breeds contempt.
Now she got me thinking ^^

Endings give me a deeper perspective

So there my good friends, two BIG life cycles are ending right now. Yes my life as I know it is definitely taking a new form, bordering on something very foreign, very unfamiliar, very new. I always believe that relationships especially with people don't end, they just evolve. They take on a different definition as we grow into adulthood. From something shallow to something very deep or vice versa.
It was a monumental weekend for me. My NGO is leaving me or my NGO is moving on without me (I prefer to see it that way because I refuse to think that I was the one who left.) AND the OTHER major relationship, oh, well no words can describe the emotions, the silence, the emptiness. It ended. OR rather it transformed. It evolved. It left me unhinged. Tears, tears, tears . . . Am getting used to not analyzing anymore because I am afraid of what my emotions, my rational mind, my soul may reveal to me. Not right. But it's good. It works for me. So there, period. No questions. No doubts. No anything. No fuss.
This is pure me. Raw. New. Tabula rasa. Clean slate. Great. Gotta move on . . . Faith not fear.

Committed to serving

“Those who choose to be servants know the most about being free. ”
― Janette Oke

Freedom

“The most important kind of freedom is to be what you really are. You trade in your reality for a role. You trade in your sense for an act. You give up your ability to feel, and in exchange, put on a mask. There can't be any large-scale revolution until there's a personal revolution, on an individual level. It's got to happen inside first.”
― Jim Morrison

Full moon reflections

. . . and then one day, a woman learns the how, the why and the what of the mystery of the universe . . .
she was stretched,
filled,
heard,
and she will never
ever be the same
again

. . .when her soul needs soothing . . .

“A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .... 
enough money within her control to move out 
and rent a place of her own even if she never wants 
to or needs to... 
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .... 
something perfect to wear if the employer or date of her 
dreams wants to see her in an hour... 
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... 
a youth she's content to leave behind.... 
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .... 
a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to 
retelling it in her old age.... 
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..... 
a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black 
lace bra... 
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .... 
one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who 
lets her cry... 
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .... 
a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone 
else in her family... 
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .... 
eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a 
recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored... 
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .... 
a feeling of control over her destiny... 
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 
how to fall in love without losing herself.. 
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 
HOW TO QUIT A JOB, 
BREAK UP WITH A LOVER, 
AND CONFRONT A FRIEND WITHOUT RUINING THE FRIENDSHIP... 
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 
when to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK AWAY... 
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 
that she can't change the length of her calves, 
the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents.. 
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 
that her childhood may not have been perfect...but it's over... 
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 
what she would and wouldn't do for love or more... 
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 
how to live alone... even if she doesn't like it... 
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 
whom she can trust, 
whom she can't, 
and why she shouldn't 
take it personally... 
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 
where to go... 
be it to her best friend's kitchen table... 
or a charming inn in the woods... 
when her soul needs soothing... 
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 
what she can and can't accomplish in a day... 
a month...and a year...” 
― Pamela Redmond Satran

Getting my life back in shape

I am planning to spend the whole afternoon planning my life. But as details, thoughts, worries abound in my mind, I guess the right phrase would be, I want to spend the afternoon finding myself. I think I lost her somewhere. All the time when I am alone, I catch myself asking, where am I? What am I doing my with life? Where the heck am I going?
Years ago, I lost a lot of myself, it was a hard process, I barely survived it. But thing is as soon the process ended, I promised myself that I will carefully piece the remaining parts together. I thought I was doing that last year, but as I look at my life right now, it feels like am back to having my self all over the place. Not one coherent force, not one recognizable portion -- just like a liquid spilled all over, with my dna all over it.
So I am going to plunge in to my favorite past time -- isolation.
There, there . . . things to do, stuff to create, details to plan, life to find and self to recognize.
This is my New Year.

Happy New Year

May we all have a blessed year ahead!