Moods #72

Skeletons | Brothers Osborne

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We all have these pretty skeletons in our closets, some of them the bones are cleaned up to glossy sheen, some are even neon colors, glow in the dark, strapped with reflectors, can also be tattooed or for those who don't want to face them, they just leave the bones unattended, which is a bit sad. Where am I going with this? Well, I mean the designs for our skeletons in the closet are endless.

I just want to actually write here that these feelings I have lately are feelings I associate in the underworld. These feelings were deep down buried when I do my annual dive deep within, but in the weirdness of life, I feel like these hidden underworld feelings are now here in the upperworld, revealed to all, open to be felt in the terra firma. So I feel so out of my shell. Feels very bare, naked. Exposed. Vulnerable.

Did the world turn when I was sleeping? Or does it mean that those underworld feelings are ready to be felt in the upperworld and that there are new fresh dark feelings when I finally dive in the underworld again in few months? Can I even get deeper? Can I even survive getting deeper in the underworld? 

Why is life full of suffering?

Lately I am very hormonal, easily irritated, terribly in bad mood. Sometimes I tell myself to just step back and just detach, but it is getting hard and hard to detach lately. I need to do more deep breaths.

To end this short reflection, I would like to share this Sandman story:

The Dream of a Thousand Cats is originally published in The Sandman #18 (1990)

Bird: Why have you ventured to the heart of the dreaming little cat?

There is nothing here for you.

Cat: I have come here for justice. I have come here for revelation. I have come here for wisdom.

The bird flew lower, but it did not come within my reach.

Bird: Justice, it repeated. Justice is a delusion you will not find on this or any other sphere.

And wisdom? Wisdom is no part of dreams, though dreams are a part of the sum of each life’s experiences, which is the only wisdom that matters.

But revelation?

That is the province of dreams.

It can be yours, but only if your heart is strong.

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PS the dark of the new moon is fast approaching