Showing posts with label creative mood. Show all posts
Showing posts with label creative mood. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 7, 2024

The Truth is: We are all graduating (part 2)

The feeling lately is that of never ending thesis, both the production part and the written thesis paper part.

I remember the thesis part of college was the toughest one, we must really dedicate our time, effort, creativity and intellectual endurance and actually enduring grit to face the challenges of doing our thesis. A whole semester must be allocated to finish such endeavor.

In production part of the thesis, there will be the Pre-production, production and Post-production, these will need a detailed time-table for every part.

Then in the written thesis part, there should be Pre-thesis writing (data gathering, theoretical framework, paradigm and draft of paper rationale), in thesis writing, of course the chunk of the writing will happen here and then, we have the post-thesis, bibliography, editing and checking of the paper.

All these take time!

But as my master said, time keeps passing by, affinities keep ripening. 

So as time passes by, we should have markers in the moving forward of our thesis work.

We should at least have an accomplishment report for every benchmark done.

We had the past 15 to 16 years for all the data gathered, now we have to make sure that the time frame and time table are laid out clearly for us. 

We have to write a thesis for the last 15-16 years of our lives.

Remember, we have to make an inventory of our lives constantly.

Thursday, March 14, 2024

Moods #55 Tears just keep streaming down my eyes last night


Sunday, January 14, 2024

Gratitude for the Purple 2023 Planner

As we come to close the lunar cycle for the year 2023, allow me to show you my accomplished diary for 2023, it is also my way of saying goodbye to this wonderful purple 2023 planner which actually was the cover I didn't choose at all, but it was the one I received, so haha, I had to make do with it.


But it proved to be not just a beautiful accident to be in possession of this nicely crafted planner, it came to be one of those notebooks which allowed me to make a lot of wonderful memories and designs in its precious pages.

So, here in my post today, I want to show my designed diary entries from January to May and then August to September, and of course, October to December. Of course, you know where to find the June and July pages in this blog already, so I will not repost anymore.

Here, though I am shy to show you, please allow me to present a labor of love and inspiration, my 2023 diary <3






Monday, December 4, 2023

Monday, March 6, 2023

Visual Journal Entry #7

 


Thursday/Friday
20230302-0303

Underground plants, jarred plants, a volcano and three 'kittens' intently observing

Sunday, September 25, 2022

New Moon Blues

I feel incredibly sentimental as I look at my computer and printer. I wanted to cry.

I was 17 years old when I started college. Our computer back then was a very old model, with a second hand printer that my parents bought from a colleague. Needless to say, technology gadgets were very expensive before, not to mention my parents' meager income plus they were in the middle of sending two kids into college, perfect recipe for extreme budget cuts ~ the state of our means to acquire good gadgets were extremely low to cannot afford at all. I understood back then that money is really important in education and handling it well needs discipline if we want access to convenience and modern technology.

While in college, there were endless nights of paper works, reports and essays, on top of that I also had to travel from Dasma to QC every single day, I didn't want to remember those crazy days but they were part of my college life. Just imagine, I had 7AM class, how on earth would I strategise to get up early and travel and not be late in my class? I know, I had a choice when I was enlisting to the classes, but I needed that GE with no other available schedule, so I had to sacrifice, and oh boy, did I?!

But months went by and I learned, even mastered the commute from our house to the University. I keenly remember the first time I had to travel alone, without my mom to shadow me because she had to work and I was a mature teenager. I had to bite my tears away as I boarded the bus alone, that ride would be around an hour and a half long ~ it would take me directly to MRT where I had to spend another 30 minutes then upon leaving QAve station, I had to ride UP campus jeep, which was another 15 to 20-minute ride. 

This was just the first half of the commute, I would do the same routine after class of course when it was time to go home.

Crazy commute. I know. But I learned a lot. About travelling. About life. About time. About roads.

Then back to school work. So after around 2 and a half hours of commute going back home, I would be so tired, but I had dinner waiting for me since I still lived with my parents back then. After dinner, I would start doing school work using our very old computer. I remembered later on, I had installed CD/DVD drive writer/reader, it was one of the biggest days of my college life haha! I knew exactly how expensive usb were before so I said to myself, re-write-able CD/DVD would be my tool/weapon of choice. Okay, so back to endless typing of reports, hours after hours of library research, procrastination, imagination and lutang/sabaw moments when I found out I didn't even understand a word out of the readings I was studying, finally I was able to complete an essay or a report. Unfortunately, completing these reports and documents were just the beginning of my trouble, as I had to telepathically communicate with our moody printer. That weird-o printer would not print anything at all. Seriously!

I mean when I needed to print some readings or net searches, yes it would print those pages clearly and correctly but in its very unknown secret deep within hell, it just wouldn't print my papers, my reports and my essays. I tried, oh I am really telling you I tried, I am well known to be a patient person, I employed my divine patience and still waited for the printer to print those needed documents, but apparently, it just wouldn't want to print my homework. 

I spent hours crying and crying for the printer to print my document, but it wouldn't budge. We are talking about me printing my essay for 8:30AM class while I was negotiating with the damned printer to print my homework at 5AM, I still had to prepare for school and of course I still needed to commute.

Around 80% of the time, it wouldn't print anything I typed, so I ended up burning my reports/homework into re-writeable CD/DVD and I had to make time allowance bec I would go to a printshop in UP to have my reports printed, aside from of course dipping into my (travel) allowance for printing cost. I sometimes saved my reports in my email, but I don't want to pay extra for computer rental in UP, so burning documents into CD/DVD had been my norm.

So back to my sentimental mood, after more than 17 years, I have a working printer and a nice computer. Life does change. Life has a funny way of showing us that those big problems a decade or almost two decades ago were gone now. 

Maybe this was what I wanted to say.

We might be sinking into troubles, problems and issues, but remember everything is possible through time. Time makes our dreams come true. Time fulfills our goals. In the right time, things eventually work out right.

It is a stormy new moon for all of us. Stay safe and dry dear readers.

Hugging you tight.

Saturday, August 13, 2022

On technology, death and stories from ancient sages

You tell me about chaos, and chaos will never say a word but just sweep you off your feet and you will find yourself back in the alien world you come from.

What a weird August for me my dear readers.

First, I just completely lost all my marbles in the office. Just work keeps on piling up, documents over documents, paper over paper, deadlines over deadlines. I sometimes really genuinely ask myself, how do I survive each single day?

But this is not the only thing I want to talk about, because there is like a big drum of chaotic stuff going on in my life right now, which brings me to the next part of the list.

Second, my desktop is dead. Oh well, it was showing symptoms of decay and death little by little for the past months, but this time, death has been its reality for the entire week, usually signalled by three 'toot, toot toot' sounds whenever it decides to just boot but it never really rebooted itself. So, I am really in state of shock, my files, my documents, the things I saved all gone, without a trace. 

*enter chaotic music  

Anyways, full of frustration from such untimely death, I turned to my laptop, Guadalupe. She (laptop) died last year as well, I think I wrote something about it to commemorate its death. The pain of losing all the files I kept years and years and even decades inside its digital womb just gone without trace. What a heartbreak! 

*enter chaotic and ominous music

But when I finally tried to turn on Guadalupe, wow it woke up from its death! and its files are still intact and she has really kept the documents inside her digital womb all this time! It's a miracle! OH MY OH MY OH MY,

*enter chaotic music with some gleeful accents

so I am typing this entry today from Guadalupe. Who says technology is predictable? Who says technology is just a lifeless inorganic current that we can command to turn off or turn on anytime. Actually technology has a life of its own, it actually uses a lot of organic elements as its base core. Our objects of receptors from this living organic technology has a tinge of ultra-modernity in it, yes that's true, but actually we are just looking at the receptors, but we don't really notice the invisibility of spirit of technology, which I think is as ancient as our oceans and our mountains and the wind system and the sun and stars.

I actually don't know how long will Guadalupe live. I am under her mercy. She has a mind of her own and I am just lucky to be able to utilize her gifts. I hope she lives long and well so I can create more with her. 

Three, actually before I was pushed to turn on the desktop, I was thinking of Aristotle and his famous line: The whole is more than the sum of its parts. I am sure we all read it when we were younger and like you, I also tried to understand what it means. It is actually a very profound sentence and it took me decades to finally understand what it means, what it really means.

The whole is like a wave, it has a peak but we will never know the beginning or end of it. It is just a kind of ocean wave that shows its peak when it appears. A wave rolls, then keeps on rolling until it builds into a peak, like a climax and then it will disintegrate and will be leveled as ocean surface when it hits the shore or the sand. It is like a team, like a collection of people in an organization or a department. The energy generated by the people is so invisible but it is a living spirit within the collective. This energy will keep on interacting with the group of people as they perform their task. There will be moments of a person getting the peak, there will be moments when the person will be the start, the spark, the initiator. Then there will be the person who will receive the end of the energy for culmination. The energy keeps on shifting so the person can be an initiator in one cycle, or the same person can be at peak in the next cycle while another person gets to be a new initiator. See, it is the collective, it is a group and the group is not just people, their energies, their spirit merge and it keeps them bouyed up or it can actually drown them too. The parts do interact with each other and in those interaction, relationships are born and this relationship can start, then it will continue and it will perish too, because of the law of time. 

See, so many factors make up the group, which is the whole as we quoted from Aristotle in the beginning. Time, relationships, spirit, merging, goals and weaknesses and challenges and achievements and failures and of course the vow of the group, its core mission. 

Interesting how this simple sentence from Aristotle can really resonate to us until now. 

I am also thinking about the story of orchard from Socrates which was retold by my spiritual teacher in one of her talks. She said that we have to learn to choose our direction from the very beginning and keep our commitment to it until the last day of our lives. This is how commitment and determination live on in a person. It is why we need to make vows because these vows give us the energy to power through any obstacles. 

The story of orchard from Socrates begins with Socrates calling his students one day in front of an orchard full of fruit trees (in some accounts apples others, oranges) and he instructed his students to pick the best looking fruit and to keep on holding onto it until they reach the very end of the orchard. Some students find the best looking fruit and picked it and reached the end of the orchard while carrying the fruit in their hands, but some students came to the end of the orchard empty handed. Socrates praised those students who found the best fruit for them and kept it, while he felt sorry for those students who never found any fruit at all. Some students who came empty handed asked Socrates for a second chance to walk the orchard again, but this Socrates declined, telling them that he gave all of them equal time to find the fruit. 

That is the story of the orchard.

Oh well, have a blessed full moon everyone and I will help myself to some of my ice cream in the fridge.

Wednesday, June 15, 2022

Writing Prompt: A Letter from Persephone to her friends (20220615)

Writing Prompt: A Letter from Persephone to her friends

Dear Friends,

I am coming to you from the above world, yes, I am back after months long in the dark. A place of total darkness.

Slowly but surely I am getting acclimated to the above world again. My internal clock has been adjusting and actually a lot quicker than the last time, I should really take note of that. Seems like I am also changing from deep within.

My mind has been so caught up with the fast-paced lifestyle here compared to the almost eternally un-moving 'time' in the world deep under, that I easily lose track of what to do next, so I remind myself to always keep a list of things I need to accomplish in correct order. Little gestures like this can save a lot of pains in the future.

So, what am I going to talk about this time? Yes, I am sure you are so tired of my updates about the difference between the under and above. Also, my dear friends, I know you are tired of the dry descriptive write-up on the space I occupy below with Him. Lastly, you are tired of my endless enumeration of our work-filled routine in both worlds.

Like you, I am also tired.

So, I needed to up my narrative, in what way, well I actually don't know yet.

Maybe, I will just list some of the things I don't want to talk about regarding my stay in His realm.

First, I don't want to talk about HIs profound fondness for drama and intensity. I will not talk about how we usually argue about the things we could have avoided by simply talking and listening and conversing with each other. I will not talk about His complicated non-verbal cues that can really be interpreted hugely differently from what He is really wanting to say or tell. I will not talk about how I cried tears after tears because He meant the opposite from what He appeared to have decided on. During times like those, I just remind myself of the Hero Narrative Formula: there should be a curve, I must expect the denouement here and then the resolution there, but wait, there is another plot twist here, aside from the complicated ego-boosting monologue there ~ see, there is a recipe for his profound fondness for drama and intensity, one should just really devote time to understand His 'story' which by the way, is layer upon layer upon layer, so we are talking about intertextuality of layers of narratives being played out by Him. Just be careful when He implodes, because surely nobody's safe when the bomb detonates. If you really want to understand Him and be His companion, you should go through bomb defusing training and keep your hands steady while you perform the critical operation because nobody can help you or save you when he explodes, I don't have to mention that you 'die' with Him when unfortunately you failed to defuse the bomb. But you can try again, because you see, I told you earlier, it is eternal down there. Word of caution, once you go with Him, you can never ever ever go back, it is a one-way ticket, so be warned.

Secondly, I don't want to talk about His fascination for isolation. That's it. Really. I have no words about this. 

Thirdly, I don't want to talk about His disgust of personal celebrations especially when it is about an occasion that will involve people who will greet you or who will pay extra attention to you. Again, I have no words about this.

Mmm, my list dwindled so quickly, I might need to think of other stuff that I can write about.

Perhaps, I will write about some 'slice of life' narrative from the underworld. Perhaps, I will write about how celebrations are celebrated in the underworld. Perhaps, I will write about Cereberus, the loyal overseer when His master is away. Perhaps, I will write about the full moons and new moons in the underworld. Perhaps, I will write about how to get lost in the complicated underworld and still find your way home.

My brain is now so spent after wringing it out for a drop of creativity. Still there is nothing.

Maybe I will come up with other creative output but tonight my pen needs to sleep in its case.

Good night my dear friends.

Love,

Persephone

Tuesday, May 31, 2022

The Scrapped Journal of Moving Log #1



NAME STAMP

I am terribly annoyed while writing this entry why? because I wrote something else earlier, but when I saved it, I cannot find it anymore in the blog! Even in the draft, hello blogger? Natutulog?

Nakakainis naman talaga.

So I guess, I have to write all over again, this is getting into my nerves, argh.

But as I was trying to remember what I wrote earlier, I am filled with such anger at how this blog cannot save even the draft? What is going on blogger? Hello?

What the F!

Okay, I am sure I will write better next time, but I am so upset, cannot even think straight. Grrrr

I may add some postscript here and there, but not now because I am filled with such violent anger at the moment, argh.


Friday, October 1, 2021

Moods #23

Today is a walk down the memory lane of high school life.

Maybe around 2nd year or 3rd year high school, if you asked me to recite the whole lyrics of RENT and JCS, you can also toss in Chicago and Moulin Rouge, I wouldn't hesitate to start right away. I knew every single word by heart. Even just a whiff of their music, I was like a hound hungry for every note of them, two notes, three notes, I knew which part and whose character would be singing that song. 

Those were my obsessed days.

Anyways, who wouldn't dance to Tango Maureen, really?

Or who wouldn't cry in the song Without You?

Or wouldn't you be affected by I'll Cover You, and its more impressionable version, I'll Cover You Reprise after Angel's death?

Of course, there's that really funny Akita Evita scene, the intro to La Vie Boheme. This is closely connected to Angel's intro to the musical, singing Today 4 U.

The battle of wills in Take me or Leave me?


So, let's listen to La Vie Boheme A & B here, and if you are into alternative or underground artists/philosophers then you could look up the works of people whose names were mentioned in the song. These passionate people were attuned into their instinctive drives to create. Not the creative deodorized drive accepted by the mainstream. 

Monday, May 31, 2021

Interchange #41


Kathang Isip | Ben&Ben

Kaya't pasensya ka na sa mga kathang isip kong ito🎵
 

Saturday, March 27, 2021

Interchange #35


Stars | Simply Red

For all the jealousy I caused you
States the reason why I'm trying to hide
As for all the things you taught me
It sends my future into clearer dimensions



Thursday, November 5, 2020

Interchange #16

Raw pure talent ^^


Sabor a mi | Monsieur Perine

Pasaran más de mil años, muchos más
Yo no sé si tenga amor la eternidad



Monday, November 25, 2013

Thursday, November 7, 2013

Bittersweet

Must be the whale cry again, or maybe just the mood here in the City.
Just feeling this familiar sense of melancholy.
Suspension of emotion, denial of isolation.

Good thing I have Genmaicha and crackers to keep me company.

Thursday, August 29, 2013

Major LSS moment

At bakit ko naman kinakanta ang himig na ito sa aking utak, puso isip. Hindi ko rin alam.

As time goes on, I realize
Just what you mean to me.
And now, now that you're near,
Promise your love that I've waited to share
And dreams of our moments together.
Color my world with hopes of loving you

Chicago / color my world

Thursday, May 9, 2013

Ode to pictures

Pictures are now the little golden tokens where my love and affection rest.
It reminds me of the good times, of those happy smiles that automatically curve our lips at the right moment with the right people.
It also brings back the memories of innocent wonders that excite our emotions when we arrive at a new place.
We point our cameras at certain angles.
We deem what is visually aesthetic.
And then we shoot.

Very dynamic.
Unedited.
Pure delight.