Hello Blogging, I missed you

Why have I been absent for the longest time?

Life had been really busy for the past few months and I think this trend is going to continue for quite a while. Tight daily schedules are getting tighter, responsibilities are getting deeper and heavier, and if I am fortunate enough to have a few minutes gap or break, I try to utilize it to update my different life lists (really I have a lot) ~ more and more I realise that time is really unforgiving, it will never wait for anyone, even for just one second! Hence, writing was pushed to the back seat, until finally (thank goodness) I had the time to pull it out from the pile of stuff that covered it for months!

Lately, most of my students are complaining about being so tired. I suspect it has something to do with the weather, it was reported that March 2015 was the hottest March since record keeping began in 1880. Ugh, I really hate to think that it will get hotter but common sense suggests that it will be the trend as it is just the beginning of summer season, so I have to bring more water every single day to rehydrate! Most importantly I have to recycle and conserve water and be more active in doing recycling.

Busy April

Right after Holy Week my brother and my sister-in-law had a thanksgiving buffet for their coming baby! So here are some pictures from the event.

My big family

Dad, me, mom, Tita Beth and Tito Ding

Mom, kuya, me and dad

Mom, me, dad, kuya and Ashley

As for volunteering ~

I have been spending my Sundays in Helping Land Tondo, Manila to teach kids in Project Pearls' summer program. I have cute kids here and they are very sweet.

Meet my students:

Kids at work

John-John, Dannyboy and Angelica

Lovely

Creating characters with clay

Kids and teachers

I am planning to spend my Sundays with them until the end of May :)

And yes, we were warned that life changes every single moment and nothing is permanent. But sometimes these warnings were just a bunch of words until we stop and really think about the changes we've been going through in our journey in life. Personally, I never know that teaching will really make a big impact in my life. And a very positive impact. I used to think that I will spend my life video editing and writing articles or making digital presentations but now I believe I found another trail that opens to more possibilities of serving and helping people. Must love teaching!

Preparing for (breathing deeply) SpEd. 

Mga repleksyon habang hinahabi ang panibagong kabanata

Anim na araw na ang nakakaraan nung magbigay ako ng Graduation Speech sa mga elementary graduates ng aking Elem Alma Mater. Nung una kinabahan ako kasi maliban sa maraming bata ang makikinig, iba ang pakiramdam na ang mga dati kong guro na dun ko lang ulit nakita ay makikinig din sa aking speech, yaiks. Mas lalong tumindi ang kaba ko nung pagdating ko sa school ay isa-isa silang lumapit sa akin at nagpa-selfie pa. Maraming nagsabi na parang walang nagbago, ganun pa rin ang hitsura ko (big grin). Meron ding nangumusta, nagtanong at ngumiti. Iba pala talaga kapag bumalik sa mga taong nakilala natin during childhood - dati ang tatangkad nila, dati sila ang may di nababaling otoridad, dati sila ang mga nakakatakot magalit kasi maraming mga misadventures at curiosities nung childhood days na mabilis nilang sinusuway o nabibisto.

Sila rin ang unang mga mentors ko.

Alam kong napakalakas ng kaba ko nung nag-speech ako. Madaming bulol moments, patigil-tigil at minsan ako lang ang natatawa sa jokes ko pero mukhang naappreciate naman nila.

Isa sa mga napansin ko, kailangan pala ng seamless na pag-co-combine ng sensibilidad ng mga bata (na gagraduate) at sensibilidad ng mga adults (teachers, parents, guests). Kasi di naman pwedeng magsalita ako sa harap nila ng hindi naiiintindihan ng mga bata - dapat pinapagana ko pa rin ang mga imaginations nila habang binibitawan ang mga salita ng aking naratibo/speech.

So ayun, mukha naman naitawid ko ng maluwalhati ang obligasyong ibinigay nila sa akin.

Masaya at nagpapasalamat ako sa oportunidad na makasama ko ulit ang aking mga dating guro pati na rin ang mga bagong graduates ng aking paaralan.

Back to school everyone!

Last weekend before the scramble for enrolment!
Freshmen orientation is left and right ^^ I do want to be part of this big stuff for young adults who are experiencing their crossroads.

My thoughts focus on disaster management.
How can I work in a disaster reduction or disaster management company if in my own life I don't know how to do damage control. No wonder I got pieces of advice like awareness and just let go.

Maybe disaster management is not for me.
Oh well.

I think people who are fit to do disaster management work are those
>who work and give extra mile
>who diligently work to conquer their fears
>not afraid of transition
>compassionate beings who can see rough patches ahead but still find courage in their hearts to move on and stay committed
>who are brave enough to touch rock bottom and flexible enough to spring back to surface

These are hard qualities to sustain during these difficult times. And I am still work in progress.
I wish that someday I will be strong enough to do this.

Finally a Sunday!

Taking a much needed break from the usual grind. Once in a while I find myself confused and lost. After a big wave of giving service to others, I always catch myself asking "Is this all I can give? Is this all I am supposed to do?" Ok to give a context, I have been out most of August working -- after the monsoon rains swamped most of the Metro and other nearby provinces -- the Foundation I am part of launched flood relief to areas affected. It was a busy month for all of us. There were times when we have to go to office as early as 6am and then we stayed until almost midnight. But yeah, we've managed and we made it well.

So, back to my digression, after the grueling month, I catch myself asking again "Is this all I can give? Is this all I am supposed to do?" Maybe not. So I started to go back to my 'normal' life, the everyday routine. But before anything else I learned many a revelation. REVELATION #1. I have to prepare myself to these kinds of calamities, once I start helping, I have to let go of the familiar routine that makes up my usual day, like waking up early to start planning the day, going to class, going to office, going home, cooking dinner, read and write academic stuff and update of social life (through net). If I want to keep my life steady I must be flexible. To lead a life diligently fulfilling my routine is really rewarding, but once a big natural calamity happens, I learned (the hard way) that I need to adjust -- not just my routine but my life. I admit I had been running low on my acads, I easily get tired (maybe because my body is adjusting yet again from the big grind from last month), I fail to wake up early -- in short I am not being diligent. I don't want that to happen.

So I am drawing up a plan to lead a more proactive life. I have to keep myself open to the fact that the impermanence of life can really destroy best laid plans but I can integrate these realities to my normal routine right? 

It is just I am worried about my acads. I am finding it more difficult to balance acads and work now. Where can I find time? Sigh.

Sorry dear readers, just having problems with my life routine, and I need to write it down so I can get the big picture.

So back to my questions about -- is this all I can do? I have academic life too but more and more I miss the Main Lib. Argh, if only I can manage my time more effectively :'(

But have to be grateful to this Sunday because it provides a fresh break from the deep, serious grind (of being in service to others) and the worries about academic stuff. Last night also, I was able to watch Potted Potter with my friends Romina and Fati. It is always lovely to have them around bec it makes me realise that I am not alone in this kind of problem -- work and acads ^^

Sigh, also I have a family thing later. My tita and tito are going to celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary by getting married again. So this time I am her bridesmaid. The motif of wedding is red and silver! I have to have my measurements taken today. Aside from that I so need to jog! 

Nevertheless, I am glad because I am back to blogging! Yay ^^ 

~

I remember my dear friend Fati telling me last May about her taking a break from work because NGO work is really hard ~ not just physically but emotionally. To be young and to realise the difficult life situation of the people around us is really exhausting. To feel their pain and to carry it with me everyday can sometimes deplete my energies. Giving service to others really feels good but sometimes we need to recuperate those parts of us that we gave away.

Also, I believe I mentioned before that I took a 9-month break from work too to focus on studies. A month before going back to work, I thought I found a way of managing my time well (work plus acads) but I was wrong. Being a part of a group in helping others is really good but I have to balance it with my acads (individual pursuit), in this light I became aware of REVELATION #2. The difficulty of balancing my group (self) and my individual (self). I have been running into the same wall of spreading myself thin (group) only to find out that my individuality is not at par with the demands of my personal projects (acads, self-mastery). BIG BIG sigh.

Oh well, and I digress.

Of researchers and their gifts to humanity

This morning my thoughts wander around writing a research paper. Doesn't it work like a treasure map that one draws up for another kindred soul who is interested in the same topic/subject? It is like creating a structured group of interconnected ideas for another soul/souls whose thought pattern vibrate/s within the same frequency.

Isn't writing a research paper exudes the feel of a fated-like writing for kindred soul? It is like a map for 'seeker' who is called to search for the same mysterious island, only that someone had come before them -- many 'someones' discovered it already -- but these good souls will share that information to anyone who cares enough to be aware of this treasured island. Don't you feel the connection? It is like having a wealth of information that one painstakingly structured, creatively laid-out, lovingly created -- then a wonderful person, whose thoughts vibrate in the same 'league' will pore over the wealth of information that one had designed meticulously? A map full of instructions for someone to read -- even after the research was published decades or centuries ago.

Yeah, this is a post of gratitude to researchers who quietly labored inside libraries, who unanimously traveled old heritage sites, who tirelessly walked long forgotten roads (metaphorically and literally), etc those who give of themselves and their skills to add jewels to the huge body of Academic Works ensuring at the same time that people of coming generation will learn about what pique the interests of different generations in various bubbles of time.    

Journey essentials (cuatro) Love the earth campaign

I am planting this idea for so long ~ to promote awareness about our environment ~ I am making good progress with the conceptualisation but it is still a vulnerable tiny bud, it needs to wait for a little bit before launching it out in the big world.

But I am excited to share the possible topics of this campaign

(1) Recycling
(2) Permaculture
(3) Living simple
(4) Conservation
(5) Alternative lifestyle

I do hope dear readers that you will read posts regarding this idea of mine and of course apply some ideas in your daily lives. So drumroll,  love the earth campaign coming very soon . . .  I have yet to create a better name for it so it's easier to recall.

night dears, have sweet dreams

Conservation and preservation of culture and resources

I want to share this article I wrote for last sem's subject. It is about water conservation and folklore. Needless to say I am really interested in proactive ways of resource conservation and culture preservation.

Our folklores told us the about the ritual of rain dance where groups of farming people come together to dance for rain and ask for good harvest from the heavens before an audience (perhaps the whole community). This is especially true for the indigenous people who live in dry lands. The rain dance is a ritual showing the importance of rain for the whole community, because as a farming community, no rain means no harvest. It is said that intricate patterns of steps should be studied by man and woman performing the rain dance, thus giving emphasis to the sacredness of this ritual both for the farmers and the community.

This ancient tradition still holds a specific importance even in this modern age, the peoples concern about rainfall. Rainfall is beginning to play an important role in our modern society as we face the effects of climate change. It was said that farmers have in their minds the regular climate pattern through long observation of nature and its ‘clock’. They follow this climate pattern for planting and harvest seasons. But as we are all aware of the climate change happening around the earth, this regular climate pattern become so irregular that farming communities are sounding the bell of alarm to ask for help.

This example of folklore can be very applicable today in such a way that it reminds us that we must put value on our resources that are now being imbalanced due to our consumerist culture. In a nut shell scientists explained climate change as a result of abusing and depletion of our natural resources to provide the population what it think it ‘needs’ without any care as to how to replace or regrow the resources that they kill/took (trees, marine lives, minerals, clean water, forest cover etc.)

In this increasingly interconnected world we can do so much as informed individuals in reversal of climate change that is slowly causing havoc around the world. By adapting the simple wisdom of our ancient folks regarding the value of rain fall not just to select group of people (farmers) but also to the whole population (community) then maybe we can really help in saving the planet from this problem. It is not so much as waiting for rain to fall miraculously right after rain dance, it is actually the values that this ritual carries with it that we the modern people must heed.

Find your source of peace

My mind is all about peace and harmony today maybe the effect of chocolate, hehe, i bet. Actually, I have been digging music and poetry for a while now, looking for fuel to motivate and move my big plans. I am officially ending the three month hard toil of inner journey, of looking within myself for answers, of painful revision of principles that I thought fossilized at the walls and floors of my soul, of realigning of my goals with the values of love, equality, hope, healing and compassion guiding me from up above. I say this is not really easy journey. No vacation at all. I get so tired just by sitting still and thinking and reflecting about my past and present and future. At times it happens unconsciously thus giving me little energy left for outside world demands. Luckily, the sem ending is not so difficult, research papers were not so difficult because I was so interested about my topic. Needless to say it was one exhausting journey. Heartbreak after another. Defeat after another. Hard toil after another. There were times of just staying in bed. Times of utter isolation. Times of self-doubt and self-absorption and self-hate. I tried to put frustration level to a minimal by not setting big goals for me, but life sometimes finds me in my well kept hiding place and alas threw big sacks of responsibility after responsibility. Well, c'est la vie.

As much as I want to keep the three months away from my circle of friends and the general community, looking at my past diary entries, I think it was impossible. January and February were times of reuniting with good friends, meeting up after class and having tea. I say it was a good distraction from too much inner-self journey. Thanks to them. March, oh that month! gave me the hardest time. It was a time of vulnerability that I found myself not leaving house at all (or bed for that matter.) I checked and found out that it was a month where my digital diary yielded 23 file entries as opposed to 8 entries on Feb. Well statistics says it all. I must be very alone last month. And the quality of entries, the tone of them agreed to this observation as well.

On the third week of March, the tight feeling started to let loose. I was able to plan and meet up with friends with some sort of sanity and a semblance of normalcy. But I'll say it was also tough. When everything is changing from within, one cannot help but notice the inefficiency of the old structures (be it concept or thing or people's behaviours) and during those times I could not do something about it because action is not possible yet when ideas are not complete. Hence, I had an entry in this blog where I was talking about big methodological shift. The idea is really inspiring and I hope I am doing it right as I am starting to plant the seeds in rich and good soil. All these stuff in my mind and in my heart are deeply guarded because they are still little babies, little fragile seeds that I will nurture day in day out. My hope is that one day they will grow into sturdy big trees of principles and values inclined to serve the earth and people.

One word: intrepid. This might be the word of the year for me. Mmm, sounds good. As I said earlier, my mind is all about harmony, so I checked out paintings and yeah, I found a work of art that paints my mind right now.
I will share this wonderful painting of Venus and Mars from Louis-Jean-Francois Lagrenee.
May you find your source of peace today.

Mars and Venus, Allegory of Peace (Getty Museum) c 1770

Description of painting from The J Paul Getty Museum website

In this gentle allegory of peace by Louis Jean François Lagrenée, Mars, the Roman god of War, throws back the rich green bed curtains that frame the scene. As the drapery parts, the morning light spills in to reveal the form of the sleeping Venus, the Roman goddess of love. Mars gazes at her, utterly captivated by her beauty. Her love has tempered his fierce character, and his shield and sword lie abandoned on the floor. Echoing the lovers' bliss, a pair of white doves, symbolizing Peace, build a nest in Mars's helmet. 

Lagrenée created his finest works, including this small, jewel-like painting, around 1770. The lavish folds of drapery, the delicate play of light over fabric and skin, and the rich, restrained palette combine to create a captivatingly beautiful image. 

Must read, must read

GNH vs GDP as explained by 

Prime Minister of Bhutan, H.E. Jigmi Y. Thinley, 

in preparation to the 2nd of April debate on GNH at the United Nations.

Please click the links below

http://www.matthieuricard.org/en/index.php/blog/208about_gross_national_happiness_and_gross_national_product_1/ 
http://www.matthieuricard.org/en/index.php/blog/209_about_gross_national_happiness_and_gross_national_product_2_continued/ 

Service is my poetry

Uno. During Anthro class, my professor was talking about the Dharma of Rama and Sita, oh I love the intertextual synchronicity of my life: I have my Buddhist Teacher in the morning teaching me about my Dharma, then I go to my Anthro class that teaches me worldview through folklore of particular countries, then I get to fuse them in my mind -- the Dharma of Faith and the teachings of culture that touches on some socio-cultural Dharma designed by religion, they sometimes conflict but I guess the bigger perspective is that I am learning how to look at how the dynamics really work. The secret is the fusion, the magic is there in the part where it is actually working! Eureka! I am really having a good time right now.

Dos. The application part is the ecological symposium -- i learned that Philippines is one of the 33 spots of rich biodiversity, wow isn't that uber amazing! I mentioned application part because, I guess my Dharma is there, to help with charting the source of problem (eg disaster, global warming) as my Master mentioned in her talk, "And when we have found the root cause of disasters, we'll know how to eliminate disasters." Hopefully to fulfill my Dharma, I  want to help to eliminate disasters. Sigh, it is a big responsibility right, but as I mentioned above, service is my poetry. Just like poets, they never get tired of seeing the beauty to translate it into words. I must be like them, I see the beauty of the world through service, and I want to conserve/preserve it for everyone to experience it -- even generations after.

Namaste.

PS this picture moved me. (picture from wikipedia)

This is a map of biodiversity hotspots (regional). The Philippines is number 18, kudos!!!